My Outstanding October: Day 18

It’s my bicentenary today! 200 days ( oh not years that would be nonsense) of alcohol abstinence. So what has been the highlight of this monumental day? Being awoken with my first ever breakfast in bed made by my generous boy? Going out for dinner with the kids? A slice of my mums homemade butter- fest shortbread? My dads rather “redder” inducing attempts at a Sir Alan Sugar ‘you’re fired!’ impersonation? No. None of them. It was the purchasing of this little bottle of spray- tastic joy!

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The wonders it’s worked on my cream carpets is a joy to behold. I think I’m either losing the plot or I’ve sprayed that much of the bloody stuff I’m high as a kite. I haven’t as yet tried to drink it so that’s something. Kidding of course! So onwards and upwards to the next hundred days. Max asked me tonight if I planned on drinking again. I replied, ‘ I’m not planning to’. It almost feels like tempting fate if I categorically state – No! A day at a time. Every day I don’t drink is a little victory. I need to find the positivity, joy and peace in each day. As I’m writing this a piece of music comes into my head. Makes me think of my special place and how I’ve missed not being there for a few weeks. Listening to this music transports me there. I find comfort in the knowledge that it is all still there in the dark of the night. The trees, the water, the sleeping and the awake creatures all happy just being. When the dawn breaks and that special place takes on another new day so will I. Another fresh start, another chance to get stuff right, a new song to sing.

Nighty night x

Ps 200 goddam days!!

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